When i was outside in the afternoon of the 17th of september there was a gesturer, a sportive man dressed in a spick and span looking dark-blue sweatshirt. Maybe there were others of them, some people, mostly woman, had all remarkable similar face-expressions, before the gesturer passed me one of them stopped at a streetcrossing after she had looked at me, turned her head to the side and laughed, somewhat derisively, as if she had told herself a joke.
When i was outside in the late afternoon near a big streetcrossing two women wearing brigth orange upper clothing beneath their jackets came towards me on the narrow pavement, it was near a hospital. So i had to stop, both were happy, laughing, and somewhat hyped. Then two men wearing also the same newish brigth signal orange crossed the streetcrossing, both in the same direction. One was wearing a basecap of this colour, the other one, riding bycicle, had a jacket of this colour. All exactly the same colour, newish looking, especially the one on the bicycle, because he had the zipper of his jacket opened.
When i was at the near supermarket in the early evening a sniffer came in, a bodybuilded man wearing sportswear, conforming pants and jacket, the name of a club on the back. Before i left he stood in the corridor and repeated.
When i was outside in the evening a policecar passed me at the market-place, it switched on the blue-ligth when it was near me, just to cross the street. Later, when i arrived at a streetcrossing at the pedestrian-zone, another policecar with blueligths on passed me, it also switched on the siren. At all the streets vwere nearly empty. Both cars were blue. When i had turned in the pedestrian zone a sniffer passed me, he was dressed orderly, wearing a fair, maybe bluish, shirt and dark pants, he was protecting from rain with a blue umbrella, all his look matched the police-theme. He had no hair, exept big dark sideburns that were connected through a moustache.
In the afternoon of the 18th a woman, in her 50ies, came towards me, she uprigthly pressed her forefinger against a teeth of her upper jar. She made a smacking noise, must have been her tongue, because she holded the finger in this position and didn't move her jar. Maybe it had a sexual meaning to her, it also looked as if it could be about death.
And two more gesturers that day, one pointing at his chin, another time a man on a bicycle, he was holding the backside of his hand below his nose, he did this gesture to people in a customs-car that was parking in the pedestrian zone, he was passing the car very close and slowly, leaned towards them when i came closer.
When i had bougth something at a near shop in the late afternoon of the 19th a nosegesturer passed me when i unlocked my bicycle. He did his gesture when he was next to me, seemed to be a signal to someone on the other side of the street. The gesturer was dressed orderly with a dark blue sweater and khaki pants. To the shop and back it took me five minutes. The only reason i can think of why they sometimes make their gestures that they are adressed at others, or at least look so, is that they want to show others how i look, for later harassments. But it wouldn't be necessary, mostly they don't do so, so maybe this variation is just psychological, they could also stand somewhere out of sigth to teach this, or just give description with instruction, this must how they usually do. This way it's more officially, so maybe it helps them to identify with the stalking, feeling like police, as authority.
In the evening some people passed me, all with much the same expressions. Somehow authoritarian, and with a sligth knowing smile. I think they were three of them, all athletic persons, bigger than me. One passed me on a small wooden bridge of a lot, there it was more obvious. Because there was some pressure behind it i thougth what could be their reason. Before the first showed up i had seen a completely white dressed muslim, cap, long shirt, pants, all freshly washed, one set. Must have been for an event or so. Just because he sticked out of the others it came in my mind that this could have to do with it, but maybe that's just the mechanics of pressure.
At nigth i was outside again, at a place in the inner city i passed three men, they were standing in a symmetric triangular formation, facing each others. Desks and chairs led my way towards them, they had seen me, but didn't step to the side, for a little moment it looked as if they confirmed each other not to move, so i passed behind one of them closely. They were all bigger men, had the same very athletic proportions, darker complexion, maybe turkish, all dressed similar, dark clothing. One of them said "Jimmy", seemed to be adressed at me.
When i was outside in the evening of the 20th there was one of them who had a typical expression, short-haired, stern looking, maybe a martial artist, stepped on the pavement from between parking cars when i came closer. Later there was a woman wearing oversized clothing. She had black curly hair, was wearing big black sunglasses despite it was dark, And black clothing that made her look obese, despite she wasn't at all, the face didn't fit to this. And a white shirt beneath the jacket. She had a chewing gum, like me, and while caming closer she attached her chewing-rhythm to mine, moving her jaws more than i did, it was fun to her. Some hours later i got it, she was dressed up as an overweigthed rabbi. There was a knifing in Frankfuhrt, so this was inspired by it. But i have no idea what it said to the girl, maybe just fun. However i don't like organized stalking, even if it shows up as a joke.
In the afternoon of the 21rst there was a black man on the market place, he was wearing loose jogging pants, at a traffic ligth he met a woman on a bicycle, when i crossed the street they did also , walking behind me. They were talking, the black man said "nazi", seemed they were talking about me, they weren't agressive, but this was the theme. I entered a baker at the streetcrossing, when i came out the man stood near me to my side at the traffic ligth(other direction than before), the woman was behind me. The woman was wearing a long scarf, black and yellow striped, much like the ones soccer fans like to wear. The man looked at me and smiled, happy people they were. Seemed they followed me because they wanted to find out if i would be a nazi.
In the evening a young man on a bicycle came towards me on the streetcrossing, diagonally on the other side of the market place as the two in the afternoon. There was no traffic, and he was cycling on the wrong side of the traffic island. He repeatedly yelled "u.s.a.", think it was three times, and then "wonderbar"( mixture of wonderful and the german wunderbar ), he was really loud. Then a friend of him came from across the marketplace and nearly drove into him with his bicycle, both laughed. The second one was wearing a very long black and yellow striped scarf, as the woman in the afternoon. In the afternoon i had bougth me a book about israel lobby( in the u.s. ), so this was to comment it.
When i was outside in the evening of the 22nd a racing motorcycle speeded up when i walked down to the next bigger street, about when it was in line of me. The engine send a vibration through my body, despite it was still some distance away, maybe 50m or so. It was of a dull yellow colour, and had a bigger patch or so on it. Later at the low bridge there were two sniffers, one before i came to the bridge, a man on a bicycle who made a longer/multiple noise, and then two men on the bridge. Not a loud noise, but both did the same, exept the one on the bridge did a shorter one. Then at the streetcrossing at the busstops at the railwaystation a man on a red painted bicycle with an engine passed me, he speeded up, he wasn't fast but tottered with the handlebar while accelerating, so it looked as if it would be hard for him to keep control at top speed. Seemed to be part two to the motorcycle, and with the colours a buddhist theme. Then in front of the shopping centre i passed an orderly dressed dark black man, white shirt and black pants, he put a cigarette in his mouth when i came closer, in his other hand he was holding something that looked like a specially long rosary made out of plain colorless plexiglass.
At night, about 10:30pm, i heared something ouside, a rhytmic speaking, like those from demonstrations or sports-fans. I tried to understand( switch of tv, open ) but only got the last 1,5 words before it stopped, than short talking at normal loudness, then nothing, it came from the next backyard, the rythm did remind me rigth-extremists, but without context i cannot say. From the area below my window i heared a noise, someone was there, maybe he wanted me to know this, but i couldn't see no one, he was standing in the dark, maybe at the bushes. Five minutes later i got outside, had nothing better to do, in the next bigger street there were several groups of people, one of them was a small group of young men with short shaved hair/bald heads, heading towards the inner city. They seemed to be busy, didn't talk to each other. The other young people i passed also didn't talk. So with this basic busy mood and more people than usual at this time it could have to do with the speaking, but it's irritating, i don't know.
On the 23rd at about 2am i heared a woman outside, speaking into a cellphone, saying "now i'm here in the ~street", specially accentuating the streetname, maybe the singing atraccted her attention.
In the afternoon there was a hasty nosegesturer, wearing white upper clothing, coming out of a car at a petrol-station
In the late afternoon i was sitting in the park, a woman with two little children passed me, a boy who walked and a girl in a push chair. The girl said "germany is playing there, and hsv" (" deutschland spielt da "), still at that age that she sounded really childish, but with a surprising rough voice and very serious, seemed the first word she was taugth must have been a boozed "deutschland".
The woman was wearing a black t-shirt and had wrapped a purple piece of cloth diagonally around her upper body.
In the late evening there was a posing man in front of a shop for running shoes. He was standing in front of the window, holding a camera in front of him. His back was much leaned backwards, but it was straigth, only bend at the hip. He was wearing a blue jacket or shirt and kind of a black beret. Seemed that he was posing as a chinese spy, propaganda-stylish posing, he didn't move at all..
Last time i visited my parents they made a present to me, a book about budhism. I took it, but i wanted to exchange it against something else, i made my experience with the budhism, of course it does not have to say that's anywhere else as it is here, but it would be too ironically. So i made my way to a bookstore on the 24th. When i arrived at the street at the near park there were two woman on bicycles(together), an asian woman and an older (white) woman, who was wearing an orange jacket, she turned in the street i came up. I had already started to turn, but she didn't look at me and turned at a narrow angle, driving on the left side, and we both had to stop. She looked at me with her so firm budhist eye, that didn't move. Proud german buddhist. When i had been at the bookstore and unlocked my bicycle an asian man walked to the bicycle next to me, stood at my side. He was wearing an red poloshirt, with thin white stripes across, beneath his jacket, maybe 50 years.
In the early evening i passed an athletic gesturer, short hair, in the inner city, and there was a jogging nosegesturer, he made his gesture as if he would make it as a sign to someone else, but there was nobody. He was wearing superblue upper clothing and white pants.
When i was on my way to the cheap supermarket in the evening of the 25th, in the next parallel street from here two men came towards me, they hurried passed two others. Both were moving independently, but they were wearing jackets of exactly he same pale khaki colour. One of them was riding a bicycle, he was looking at his crotch for a moment, they sometimes like to do so. Then at the corner of the bigger street there was an older woman, looking imperious to somewhere above ground level, with her firm eyes. She had blue, as the woman with the orange jacket the day before. This one was wearing a blue ample sweater, synthetic fleece or so. When i had left the supermarket and was standing in front of my bicycle a woman passed on the pavement below me. She looked up to me, seemed she was searching for someone, but there was only me. She had long black hair, grey eyes, she looked as if she could have pain, and she had a much inhibited body posture. Seemed she was aping me, because of my bad health. An overweigthed teenage girl was laughing on her.
When i was in a petrol station at nigth, standing at the till, someone came in and stood behind me, in this watchman-like manner and said "yes, that's what it looks like !"( "Ja, so sieht's aus!" ) towards me, then added a "hmm" to point out that was phoning. I looked at him, he was wearing a black-and red striped sweater beneath his jacket, he had a headset, so this allowed better posing than a cellphone.
Basically there is the tendency that the first descriptions are more detailed than the last days.
They didn't do so much these days, so i have described most of them. My neighbour above me was less attached to me than most the time.
( have edited "barking justice", added to the 27th of august )
Mittwoch, 26. September 2007
Sonntag, 16. September 2007
some shit
At about noon on of the 4th of september i've seen the disguised muslim-woman from the 30/31rst again, this time with a child. Don't know when i've seen a woman dressed like this before, or if at all in this town.
In the afternoon a nosegestuer passed me before i entered a supermarket, maybe late 40ies, mustache, blue jacket, red poloshirt with thin red stripes, looked just common, watchman-like behaviour as many of them show. When i was standing in line an athletic black-dressed man with a white circle printed on shirt entered, he wanted to be seen, this was because the day before i made a hasty move as if i wanted to turn when i was cycling at the near park and had seen a black dressed jogger who had printed an against-nazi on his t-shirt. The jogger was still some distance away, but i think he had seen this and wondered, and now they made fun of this( wich doesn't say that he was one of them ). The stalkers didn't use this crushed-swastika-symbol at all (they once had a short st.pauli-t-shirt-theme), so i have not "learned" that this must have anything to do with me, but with some lefties, the ones in the park, and many black my unconscious just interpreted that it would be an accusation. It can happen maybe a few times a year that my incertitude is obvious out of context like this, and at all there have been a few times where it was really overdone, even agressive, that it made me feel ashamed. When they show again and again then it's full and then gets to unconscious, wich at the end means that the perception accepted their reality.
When i was outside in the afternoon on the 5th two older men with a little black-end-white dog passed me, the dog was tossing the leash that it was constantly at the same angle and same tension on it, and the dog had leaned his head to the side and was holding it in exactly the same position, Looked as if it was performing. It was on the cycle-lane, and didn't react at all when i came closer, the man didn't also, so i bowed it on the lawn. On my way back on a bigger street leading towards the inner city a man asked me the way. He was wearing a red-and-black plaid shirt, a pulled back basecap with flames on the peak and dusty-dirty( grey because of this ) workpants. He was walking fast, a gaunt black-haired man with moustache, he had penetrative grey eyes, seemed that he was drugged. He said he wanted to get to a location for techno-pertys( usually one of my last choices if i would go out ), near the courthouse. It was still before 6pm, it was usually some acting. In the end of the 90ies i lived in this street, i had a good distance to walk to the inner city, and was fast.
Half an hour after i had arrived home someone outside said loudly towards the direction of my window/room "hello you two !"( "Hallo ihr beiden !" ), then added, usually holding a cellphone "it's time for supper"( "es gibt Abendbrot" ), to take away from it.
Near midnigth, already on the 6th, on my way to a petrol-station, i passed a woman with a smaller dog in the next parallel street. They were on the pavement, i was in the middle of the street, didn't see the dog, but it started to bark when i was in line of them, could have been on command, the way the woman bend down towards the dog when i had passed looked also like this. So they had a dog-theme these days. When i arrived at the petrol station there was a couple, dressed conservative in black and dark grey, at the till, the woman said to the clerk " -filling station attendant, i know this. My sister once had worked at a petrol station, i was always in fear for her. But you have bulletproof glass. " (" Tankwart, das kenne ich, meine Schwester hat mal an einer Tankstelle gearbeitet, da hatte ich Angst. Aber sie haben hier ja Panzerglas. "). Then they turned around and left, looked much like acting.
About noon when i headed to the baker next to a shop street down where i bougth tabak, three people, looked somewhat like lefties, on bicycles hurried to arrive there, all coming from different directions, as if they were soaked in by the baker. So i decided to moved to the next baker, the next person who passed me was a man with black sunglasses, looked like a fascist, he had leaned his head to the side, derisively smiling, he made a slight sniffing noise. When i was sitting in the near park three man passed me, one said "he always openes the doors, even if the handles are straigth (horizontal), even in public buildings" (" er macht ja immer die Türen auf, auch wenn die Griffe gerade sind, auch in öffentlichen Gebäuden "), sounded as if he was talking about a dog that is not his one, but has to be important to him.
In the afternoon i was at the circus again, to take some sketches. I asked at the till, so i could move freely there. So if the missing-dog-theme was no bluff and they wanted to know something from me they could have asked me then, that was all i could do. Once a man came up to me, i first thougth that he would be from the circus, because he walked so purposeful, so i stepped to the side. He then left the area through the fence that was opened last time, and closed it so i could hear, then he stood outside and had a look at the animals-from where i was standing first, the last time. He was a bodybuilded person, grey eyes, grey t-shirt.
I've seen the runners in suits that day, this time they were three. Maybe they work near here, i think i've seen them before. When i mentioned them in my last posting their behaviour could hardly been accidentially, but this time they were just standing there.
When i walked towards the shopping centre in the late afternoon a grey-haired dark black man passed me on a bicycle on the market place, he was greeting me, friendly. I greeted him back. So normally people who don't know one wouldn't greet, maybe black migrants have been set against me at a scale that's no secret, and then this one was just curious. In the next street there was a black small van with blackened windows at the back waiting at a streetcrossing, a red car with a black driver stopped next to him, before i passed them the (white) driver of the black car made a loud sniffing noise. After i had passed the red car moved on, the black car was still waiting. In the shopping center i met a girl i know, haven't seen since many years, she lives in another city. Can't tell her about my situation, it would sound too strange, and someone would explain to her that i'm mad.
Near midnigth, already on the 7th, a car stopped on the other side of the street, an authoritarian sounding man said loudly "do you want molotov ?" (" wollt ihr molotov ?"), then a girl on the backseat said a well-behaved "yes", then another girl laughed and said so also. The second answering one sounded somewhat like the one i had met in the shopping centre. Then one of them got out of the car, the car moved on.
At about 3am a car stopped, someone said "he's not working."(" er arbeitet nicht" ), then the car moved on.
When i came back home in the early evening the children who had been singing "we are sick kanaks" were standing on the other side of the street.
When i was outside at noon on the 8th a black, red, white dressed weigth-trained energetic jogger passed me, when his fist was in good position for a punch he breathes out somewhat deeper.
At nigth a bigger group of young people walked up the street here, they seemed somewhat upset, one said loudly "you don't belong to us". Another time someone said "at the window there", and something cryptic in the morning.
When i was at the laundry in the afternoon of the 9th and was smoking a cigarette outside, a yellow car stopped in front of me at the traffic ligth. It looked newish, and the yellow looked somewhat toy-like. On the passenger-seat there was a bald shaved man with a thin beard around his chin, he looked at me. I had a newspaper and read it, when they started i looked again at them, the man still looked at me, turning his head around. When i entered the laundry again a man wearing a t-shirt of the same yellow colour passed me. Could have been one of the aikido-people, not sure, i didn't look at him for long, it was already too confusing. He left the laundry, short time later the bald shaved one entered with his girlfriend. He was big and heavier build, his girlfriend was corpulent. When they left he passed in front of me and stared at me again. Maybe a rigthist. On my way back there was a black dressed man on a black mtb waiting at a traffic ligth in front of me. He turned around and looked into my eyes, as if this would have something to say. He was completely dressed in black, everything in the same black tone, maybe new clothing, also the mtb. Geled black hair and sideburns. On the back of his hooded sweater there was a simple white "deutschrock.de" printed.
In the late afternoon/early evening i brougth empty beer-cans to a petrolstation. In the station there was an athletic man with a newish black t-shirt, a big white "black flag" printed on the back. He had longer hair, was in companion of a girlfriend who was wearing white pants. When i cowered down and was putting the cans in a basket he was standing in front of me and said, really loud " no one cares if you smoke pot ! "(" es ist scheissegal ob du kiffst "), looking to somewhere at the wall or so. Then an old man, wearing a skipper/captain-cap, completely dressed in nearly black blue entered, the orator :" A policeman enters. Hello ! "( "ein polizist kommt rein. Hallo !" ). Then they left, the woman was holding his arm to support him, he did some poor acting, as if he would miss the door, gestikulating.
In the late evening/early afternoon of the 10th i was at the east-side with my bicycle(as usual), near the river a man asked me for the way, he had darker complexion, was wearing a white jacket and had a big envelope in his hand, he wanted to go to another quarter of the town, he asked me for the white (pedestrian)bridge. This would have made a really healthy walk, strange postman. On my way back i passed the circus, in front of the caged area there was a man who talked with some circus-people, asked something about the animals. He was wearing a black fligthjacket, brown cargo-pants, a military backpack and brown shoes, similar to the shoes one of them was wearing the previous day. Looked like a lefty. He reminds me one of the leaders, but he was bald, this one had long hair. But they rarely show up, so i don't know. I was standing at the water and smoked a cigarette. There was some distance to the circus, after a while the man came around the corner, when he passed i looked at him, he looked smaller than the one he reminds me, couldn't even estimate if he would be bigger than me, seemed that he wanted to appear smaller, had his head much foreward, with his big steps he appeared lanky, somewhat trollish. He looked at me. When he was a bigger distance away he consistantly raised his hand three times to his mouth, as a gesture, too fast that he could really have smoked a cigarette. Maybe he was it, or someone of them who had similarity with him. Then, when i passed the circus again, there were some girls, younger than 10, playing with a monkey, they liked to affrigth all the time when the monkey hopped around. I wondered that the monkey was out of the cage, because no adults were near. I asked one of the girls if they were from the circus, she said yes. Then she said no. But they had asked at the entrance because of the monkey, it's o.k.. I think the first answer was rigth.( some days later i've read that some circus-animals had been "freed" two days before )
Near the railwaystation there was one of their sniffers, a man wearing a black and white leather jacket.
When i was on my way to a petrolstation at nigth someone in the bushes of the near park made a cracking noise when i passed, it's their territory.
When i came back from the baker in the morning of the 11th a black dressed woman on a bicycle stopped for no apparent reason and looked at me, very astounded.
At noon i had bougth something at a shop street down, when i was waiting at the street a short-haired young man wearing an olive-green sweatshirt and earphones passed on a bicycle, he nodded at me as if he would know me, but not really like a greeting, more like pointing at me.
I was outside with my bicycle for an hour in the afternoon, first of them was a young man, wearing a blue sweatshirt with white stripes on his sleeves, like armlets, he was carrying a bag and made a nosegesture. The next one of them appeared in a driveway i passed, he had his head shaved, was wearing an olive-green t-shirt, he was holding the palm of his hand at his cheek, in his other hand he had a key on a short rope( as they often have at petrolstations, like the one where i was two days before with the cans ). Near a sports field a bigger group of joggers passed me, all athletic men dressed the same, the last one was a black one, he stopped and payed attention to a bush when i passed. When i arrived back and had opened the door a bald-shaved man passed me, he was wearing olive-green military pants and military boots, the pants under his socks and boots, and a dark hooded sweater with the city-name on it. He was wearing glasses and was carrying a bag. When i looked at him i moved my mouth a little, i'm not the perfect no-reaction-man, and he immediatly caugth this up and amplified this, moved his face when he sees a sligth move in mine, so with this he was related to me in a way.
In the late afternoon i walked to a shop, before i arrived a man dressed that his colours matched mine came out, he looked agressive, turned his head around and looked at me, then straigthened his arms downwards, the palms towards me, making a satan-symbol with each hand. Maybe he and the others exept woman and jogger today were rigthists.
Short time before i left home in the early evening someone yelled "Deutschland", street down, sounded agressive. In the morning someone already yelled "Deutschland", street up, a worker, not so agressive, but somehow claiming. I was at a petrol-station, the man in front of me had bald-shaved hair, was wearing a khaki military-jacket, jeans and fair leather boots. Maybe he was a support-US-troops-variation of todays military theme. I bougth me fast-food at a snack-bar, behind me there were two people, maybe arabian, one had darker complexion, the other one was black. One of them said two words with hissing "s" towards me. And on my way back a man on a bicycle passed me, black sweatshirt, grey pants, studded belt, he demonstratively looked at me, turning his head when passing.
And over the day some older but vital stern men had a look at me, maybe three. Could have been from a police-background or so.
Have described all that day.
At about 3 am of the 12th two teenager were running up the street here, one hits something with a batten three times, sounded the same each time, and the time between the strikes was the same. When they had crossed the street one kicked against a bicycle. Sounded as if they were trained.
When i was outside in the afternoon some grim looking people passed me at the marketplace, one was a woman with a white patch covering her left eye. In the next street a man with a dog, a husky, passed me, he had his eyes closed. When he had passed me on the 29th of august he had his eyes closed also. At the low bridge the man with military pants and boots, who had passed me when i opened the door the day before, passed me, he was carrying the same bag as the day before. When i was eating fries in the pedestrain zone he passed me again.
When i was in the near supermarket in the late afternoon a big man came up to me with some hurried steps, so i didn't know if he wanted to run into me. He then made a noise as if he was excusing at a little child.
When i was outside in the afternoon of the 13th a man wearing a green pullover and brown pants, police colours, passed me just when i had turned in the next bigger street. Then at the near park another man dressed like this and with a white basecap passed me on a bicycle. Both not older than 30. Outside the town i decided to walk for a while, just to walk somewhere without always having to think when the next one will show up. But then one of them passed me, on a bicycle, he looked at me in a tense way, he frowned and was holding this expression and holded the back of his hand under his nose. He was a sportive man, wearing a brown jacket with a fur-collar, reminded me james dean. On my way back a man wearing a yellowish-green shirt and khaki pants past me, rubbing his nosebridge. And back in town a man on a bicycle passed me, wearing a pullover of this yellowish-green colour, he made a sniffing noise when he passed me. The two last were older men, their gesture/noise appeared naturally, but with the policecolour-theme and timing it was obvious that they were their people.
In the evening of the 14th a man wearing a t-shirt of a thai-boxing-school passed me. He had a grim expression and shaved hair, so i thougth if he was a rigthist. That he was wearing this t-shirt does not have to say that he was from the school. In the afternoon i bougth me chai-tea, so maybe that's why this man appeared.
The next time i was outside i passed a group of people, some were standing in front of a bank, very close to the window and looking inside, there wasn't usually anything of interest, one said "didn't see anything" (" hab ich nicht gesehen ") when i passed, he had iroquese-shaved sides and was wearing a blue jeans with white chlored dots. I was at another bank, the one near home, a young couple was standing in front of it. He had black gi-styled hair, she was a fair black, not much darker than whites, but a "black" skintone. I entered the bank, they seemed to be waiting for something, moved on after i had passed them. He looked sportive, wouldn't wonder if he was doing thaiboxing.
At nigth on my way to a petrolstation a young black dressed teenager, hooded sweater and coat, leaned his head to the side and raised his arm from the side above his head before i passed him at the near park, i was behind him. Kind of how-mad-does-it-look necromancer-gesture, seemed to be a lefty. Before i arrived at the station a conservative dressed woman, wearing a fair short coat and black pants, made a sniffing noise when i passed her. At the petrolstation there were two men in front of me, one stored beer in his backpack, the other was a somewhat conservatively black dressed man. Then a man with pale skin, wearing a limegreen t-shirt over a white sweatshirt arrived with a bicycle. He stood behind me, had grey eyes with very small pupils, he was all the time talking to himself. When the black dressed man bougth something a black taxi arrived, it came so close that his fender nearly touched the kerbstone. The taxidriver knew the men who was standing in front of me, i walked to the till, the taxidriver, a bigger heavy bristle-bearded man, shouted joyfully "i have to go for big boys"( "ich muss mal für grosse jungs"/~to go for small boys~ means to pee in german ), and when i was still standing there, taking the beer, he hurryed came close behind me and put something in the drawer. Then he got the toilet key( on a short rope as pendant ), and walked behind the station. The man with the small pupils asked for fruit-gums( Fruchtgummis ), speaking very cranky. Maybe it was part of a composite joke.
At nigth i heared some meaningful coughs outside.
When i arrived in the pedestrian zone in the afternoon of the 15th, there was a man standing, demonstratively waiting, i already expected that it was for me. He had short hair, was wearing an earthy-orange t-shirt beneath his jacket, with his rigth he was holding a cellphone at his ear, he was holding his left arm in front of him, looking at the watch. He didn't move at all, had a strained expression, the way he was posing looked as if a military exercise would be going on. In the moment i passed him he started to move, walking in the direction i came from, he had used my arrival as his trigger. There were many people in town, because there was a open-air-concert at the water.
In the evening i was again at the petrolstation i had been the day before. There was a bigger group of teenagers in front of it, one yelled "shit" (" scheisse ") when i arrived, not adressed to me, but timing. When i was standing line up the man who paid was standing there for a while without moving, it took him somewhat longer. In front of me there was a couple, not older than 18, he was tall and slender, wearing dark clothing, she was blonde. She had a monologue about frogs all the time, and spoke like a little child, but serious. She had a frog, the eyes were soo big. She had another frog. The clerk was dressed in black, he had similarity with the one from aikido who was doing most for them. But the clerk was smaller and slender. He had a black button as ear-decoration, maybe he was gay. When i payed he snorted one nostril. A man came in and hurried headed at the till. While i was still standing there he said "the two"( "die zwei" ) and payed, without waiting that i stepped to the side, same as the one yesterday did. I looked at him. He was it again, the bristle-bearded. He was wearing a black t-shirt, something printed on it. He didn't wait for exchange, walked out, this time he had a red car.
Near midnigth, already on the 16th, i was again at a petrolstation. I had consumed a few beer, and wanted a few more. When i was standing at the till a couple arrived, then stood next to me. The woman had a narrow nosebridge, she was wearing a snow-camouflage-coat. The man was standing with his back towards me, he was wearing a black and red leather jacket. They talked fastly all the time, seemed to be russian. The man said a single sentence in german " he belongs to it/them " (" Der gehört dazu "). Seemed it refers to me. They were standing between me and my bicycle, i looked at them, just because they stood near me. Then the woman said "you have looked at me" ("du hast mich angesehen"), the man said so also. Both looked at me, their eyes didn't move at all, their expressions were so similar that i thougth if they would have consumed a substance that supported this. Maybe it was thougth as a classic intro for an attack. Maybe it was the beer, i just said "so what, you (two) are looking at me also"( "na und, ihr seht mich doch auch an" ), then ignored them and stored the beer into my bag. The man agressively asked me if i would have finished at the till, i had and took my bicycle, and said they should relax(locker bleiben) when i left. Maybe i had luck.
In the afternoon a gesturer passed me in the near park, a man wearing a poloshirt and pants of the same dark blue colour, he covered his mouth with his hand.
Maybe i've described about 2/3 of them an average, varies by day.
In the afternoon a nosegestuer passed me before i entered a supermarket, maybe late 40ies, mustache, blue jacket, red poloshirt with thin red stripes, looked just common, watchman-like behaviour as many of them show. When i was standing in line an athletic black-dressed man with a white circle printed on shirt entered, he wanted to be seen, this was because the day before i made a hasty move as if i wanted to turn when i was cycling at the near park and had seen a black dressed jogger who had printed an against-nazi on his t-shirt. The jogger was still some distance away, but i think he had seen this and wondered, and now they made fun of this( wich doesn't say that he was one of them ). The stalkers didn't use this crushed-swastika-symbol at all (they once had a short st.pauli-t-shirt-theme), so i have not "learned" that this must have anything to do with me, but with some lefties, the ones in the park, and many black my unconscious just interpreted that it would be an accusation. It can happen maybe a few times a year that my incertitude is obvious out of context like this, and at all there have been a few times where it was really overdone, even agressive, that it made me feel ashamed. When they show again and again then it's full and then gets to unconscious, wich at the end means that the perception accepted their reality.
When i was outside in the afternoon on the 5th two older men with a little black-end-white dog passed me, the dog was tossing the leash that it was constantly at the same angle and same tension on it, and the dog had leaned his head to the side and was holding it in exactly the same position, Looked as if it was performing. It was on the cycle-lane, and didn't react at all when i came closer, the man didn't also, so i bowed it on the lawn. On my way back on a bigger street leading towards the inner city a man asked me the way. He was wearing a red-and-black plaid shirt, a pulled back basecap with flames on the peak and dusty-dirty( grey because of this ) workpants. He was walking fast, a gaunt black-haired man with moustache, he had penetrative grey eyes, seemed that he was drugged. He said he wanted to get to a location for techno-pertys( usually one of my last choices if i would go out ), near the courthouse. It was still before 6pm, it was usually some acting. In the end of the 90ies i lived in this street, i had a good distance to walk to the inner city, and was fast.
Half an hour after i had arrived home someone outside said loudly towards the direction of my window/room "hello you two !"( "Hallo ihr beiden !" ), then added, usually holding a cellphone "it's time for supper"( "es gibt Abendbrot" ), to take away from it.
Near midnigth, already on the 6th, on my way to a petrol-station, i passed a woman with a smaller dog in the next parallel street. They were on the pavement, i was in the middle of the street, didn't see the dog, but it started to bark when i was in line of them, could have been on command, the way the woman bend down towards the dog when i had passed looked also like this. So they had a dog-theme these days. When i arrived at the petrol station there was a couple, dressed conservative in black and dark grey, at the till, the woman said to the clerk " -filling station attendant, i know this. My sister once had worked at a petrol station, i was always in fear for her. But you have bulletproof glass. " (" Tankwart, das kenne ich, meine Schwester hat mal an einer Tankstelle gearbeitet, da hatte ich Angst. Aber sie haben hier ja Panzerglas. "). Then they turned around and left, looked much like acting.
About noon when i headed to the baker next to a shop street down where i bougth tabak, three people, looked somewhat like lefties, on bicycles hurried to arrive there, all coming from different directions, as if they were soaked in by the baker. So i decided to moved to the next baker, the next person who passed me was a man with black sunglasses, looked like a fascist, he had leaned his head to the side, derisively smiling, he made a slight sniffing noise. When i was sitting in the near park three man passed me, one said "he always openes the doors, even if the handles are straigth (horizontal), even in public buildings" (" er macht ja immer die Türen auf, auch wenn die Griffe gerade sind, auch in öffentlichen Gebäuden "), sounded as if he was talking about a dog that is not his one, but has to be important to him.
In the afternoon i was at the circus again, to take some sketches. I asked at the till, so i could move freely there. So if the missing-dog-theme was no bluff and they wanted to know something from me they could have asked me then, that was all i could do. Once a man came up to me, i first thougth that he would be from the circus, because he walked so purposeful, so i stepped to the side. He then left the area through the fence that was opened last time, and closed it so i could hear, then he stood outside and had a look at the animals-from where i was standing first, the last time. He was a bodybuilded person, grey eyes, grey t-shirt.
I've seen the runners in suits that day, this time they were three. Maybe they work near here, i think i've seen them before. When i mentioned them in my last posting their behaviour could hardly been accidentially, but this time they were just standing there.
When i walked towards the shopping centre in the late afternoon a grey-haired dark black man passed me on a bicycle on the market place, he was greeting me, friendly. I greeted him back. So normally people who don't know one wouldn't greet, maybe black migrants have been set against me at a scale that's no secret, and then this one was just curious. In the next street there was a black small van with blackened windows at the back waiting at a streetcrossing, a red car with a black driver stopped next to him, before i passed them the (white) driver of the black car made a loud sniffing noise. After i had passed the red car moved on, the black car was still waiting. In the shopping center i met a girl i know, haven't seen since many years, she lives in another city. Can't tell her about my situation, it would sound too strange, and someone would explain to her that i'm mad.
Near midnigth, already on the 7th, a car stopped on the other side of the street, an authoritarian sounding man said loudly "do you want molotov ?" (" wollt ihr molotov ?"), then a girl on the backseat said a well-behaved "yes", then another girl laughed and said so also. The second answering one sounded somewhat like the one i had met in the shopping centre. Then one of them got out of the car, the car moved on.
At about 3am a car stopped, someone said "he's not working."(" er arbeitet nicht" ), then the car moved on.
When i came back home in the early evening the children who had been singing "we are sick kanaks" were standing on the other side of the street.
When i was outside at noon on the 8th a black, red, white dressed weigth-trained energetic jogger passed me, when his fist was in good position for a punch he breathes out somewhat deeper.
At nigth a bigger group of young people walked up the street here, they seemed somewhat upset, one said loudly "you don't belong to us". Another time someone said "at the window there", and something cryptic in the morning.
When i was at the laundry in the afternoon of the 9th and was smoking a cigarette outside, a yellow car stopped in front of me at the traffic ligth. It looked newish, and the yellow looked somewhat toy-like. On the passenger-seat there was a bald shaved man with a thin beard around his chin, he looked at me. I had a newspaper and read it, when they started i looked again at them, the man still looked at me, turning his head around. When i entered the laundry again a man wearing a t-shirt of the same yellow colour passed me. Could have been one of the aikido-people, not sure, i didn't look at him for long, it was already too confusing. He left the laundry, short time later the bald shaved one entered with his girlfriend. He was big and heavier build, his girlfriend was corpulent. When they left he passed in front of me and stared at me again. Maybe a rigthist. On my way back there was a black dressed man on a black mtb waiting at a traffic ligth in front of me. He turned around and looked into my eyes, as if this would have something to say. He was completely dressed in black, everything in the same black tone, maybe new clothing, also the mtb. Geled black hair and sideburns. On the back of his hooded sweater there was a simple white "deutschrock.de" printed.
In the late afternoon/early evening i brougth empty beer-cans to a petrolstation. In the station there was an athletic man with a newish black t-shirt, a big white "black flag" printed on the back. He had longer hair, was in companion of a girlfriend who was wearing white pants. When i cowered down and was putting the cans in a basket he was standing in front of me and said, really loud " no one cares if you smoke pot ! "(" es ist scheissegal ob du kiffst "), looking to somewhere at the wall or so. Then an old man, wearing a skipper/captain-cap, completely dressed in nearly black blue entered, the orator :" A policeman enters. Hello ! "( "ein polizist kommt rein. Hallo !" ). Then they left, the woman was holding his arm to support him, he did some poor acting, as if he would miss the door, gestikulating.
In the late evening/early afternoon of the 10th i was at the east-side with my bicycle(as usual), near the river a man asked me for the way, he had darker complexion, was wearing a white jacket and had a big envelope in his hand, he wanted to go to another quarter of the town, he asked me for the white (pedestrian)bridge. This would have made a really healthy walk, strange postman. On my way back i passed the circus, in front of the caged area there was a man who talked with some circus-people, asked something about the animals. He was wearing a black fligthjacket, brown cargo-pants, a military backpack and brown shoes, similar to the shoes one of them was wearing the previous day. Looked like a lefty. He reminds me one of the leaders, but he was bald, this one had long hair. But they rarely show up, so i don't know. I was standing at the water and smoked a cigarette. There was some distance to the circus, after a while the man came around the corner, when he passed i looked at him, he looked smaller than the one he reminds me, couldn't even estimate if he would be bigger than me, seemed that he wanted to appear smaller, had his head much foreward, with his big steps he appeared lanky, somewhat trollish. He looked at me. When he was a bigger distance away he consistantly raised his hand three times to his mouth, as a gesture, too fast that he could really have smoked a cigarette. Maybe he was it, or someone of them who had similarity with him. Then, when i passed the circus again, there were some girls, younger than 10, playing with a monkey, they liked to affrigth all the time when the monkey hopped around. I wondered that the monkey was out of the cage, because no adults were near. I asked one of the girls if they were from the circus, she said yes. Then she said no. But they had asked at the entrance because of the monkey, it's o.k.. I think the first answer was rigth.( some days later i've read that some circus-animals had been "freed" two days before )
Near the railwaystation there was one of their sniffers, a man wearing a black and white leather jacket.
When i was on my way to a petrolstation at nigth someone in the bushes of the near park made a cracking noise when i passed, it's their territory.
When i came back from the baker in the morning of the 11th a black dressed woman on a bicycle stopped for no apparent reason and looked at me, very astounded.
At noon i had bougth something at a shop street down, when i was waiting at the street a short-haired young man wearing an olive-green sweatshirt and earphones passed on a bicycle, he nodded at me as if he would know me, but not really like a greeting, more like pointing at me.
I was outside with my bicycle for an hour in the afternoon, first of them was a young man, wearing a blue sweatshirt with white stripes on his sleeves, like armlets, he was carrying a bag and made a nosegesture. The next one of them appeared in a driveway i passed, he had his head shaved, was wearing an olive-green t-shirt, he was holding the palm of his hand at his cheek, in his other hand he had a key on a short rope( as they often have at petrolstations, like the one where i was two days before with the cans ). Near a sports field a bigger group of joggers passed me, all athletic men dressed the same, the last one was a black one, he stopped and payed attention to a bush when i passed. When i arrived back and had opened the door a bald-shaved man passed me, he was wearing olive-green military pants and military boots, the pants under his socks and boots, and a dark hooded sweater with the city-name on it. He was wearing glasses and was carrying a bag. When i looked at him i moved my mouth a little, i'm not the perfect no-reaction-man, and he immediatly caugth this up and amplified this, moved his face when he sees a sligth move in mine, so with this he was related to me in a way.
In the late afternoon i walked to a shop, before i arrived a man dressed that his colours matched mine came out, he looked agressive, turned his head around and looked at me, then straigthened his arms downwards, the palms towards me, making a satan-symbol with each hand. Maybe he and the others exept woman and jogger today were rigthists.
Short time before i left home in the early evening someone yelled "Deutschland", street down, sounded agressive. In the morning someone already yelled "Deutschland", street up, a worker, not so agressive, but somehow claiming. I was at a petrol-station, the man in front of me had bald-shaved hair, was wearing a khaki military-jacket, jeans and fair leather boots. Maybe he was a support-US-troops-variation of todays military theme. I bougth me fast-food at a snack-bar, behind me there were two people, maybe arabian, one had darker complexion, the other one was black. One of them said two words with hissing "s" towards me. And on my way back a man on a bicycle passed me, black sweatshirt, grey pants, studded belt, he demonstratively looked at me, turning his head when passing.
And over the day some older but vital stern men had a look at me, maybe three. Could have been from a police-background or so.
Have described all that day.
At about 3 am of the 12th two teenager were running up the street here, one hits something with a batten three times, sounded the same each time, and the time between the strikes was the same. When they had crossed the street one kicked against a bicycle. Sounded as if they were trained.
When i was outside in the afternoon some grim looking people passed me at the marketplace, one was a woman with a white patch covering her left eye. In the next street a man with a dog, a husky, passed me, he had his eyes closed. When he had passed me on the 29th of august he had his eyes closed also. At the low bridge the man with military pants and boots, who had passed me when i opened the door the day before, passed me, he was carrying the same bag as the day before. When i was eating fries in the pedestrain zone he passed me again.
When i was in the near supermarket in the late afternoon a big man came up to me with some hurried steps, so i didn't know if he wanted to run into me. He then made a noise as if he was excusing at a little child.
When i was outside in the afternoon of the 13th a man wearing a green pullover and brown pants, police colours, passed me just when i had turned in the next bigger street. Then at the near park another man dressed like this and with a white basecap passed me on a bicycle. Both not older than 30. Outside the town i decided to walk for a while, just to walk somewhere without always having to think when the next one will show up. But then one of them passed me, on a bicycle, he looked at me in a tense way, he frowned and was holding this expression and holded the back of his hand under his nose. He was a sportive man, wearing a brown jacket with a fur-collar, reminded me james dean. On my way back a man wearing a yellowish-green shirt and khaki pants past me, rubbing his nosebridge. And back in town a man on a bicycle passed me, wearing a pullover of this yellowish-green colour, he made a sniffing noise when he passed me. The two last were older men, their gesture/noise appeared naturally, but with the policecolour-theme and timing it was obvious that they were their people.
In the evening of the 14th a man wearing a t-shirt of a thai-boxing-school passed me. He had a grim expression and shaved hair, so i thougth if he was a rigthist. That he was wearing this t-shirt does not have to say that he was from the school. In the afternoon i bougth me chai-tea, so maybe that's why this man appeared.
The next time i was outside i passed a group of people, some were standing in front of a bank, very close to the window and looking inside, there wasn't usually anything of interest, one said "didn't see anything" (" hab ich nicht gesehen ") when i passed, he had iroquese-shaved sides and was wearing a blue jeans with white chlored dots. I was at another bank, the one near home, a young couple was standing in front of it. He had black gi-styled hair, she was a fair black, not much darker than whites, but a "black" skintone. I entered the bank, they seemed to be waiting for something, moved on after i had passed them. He looked sportive, wouldn't wonder if he was doing thaiboxing.
At nigth on my way to a petrolstation a young black dressed teenager, hooded sweater and coat, leaned his head to the side and raised his arm from the side above his head before i passed him at the near park, i was behind him. Kind of how-mad-does-it-look necromancer-gesture, seemed to be a lefty. Before i arrived at the station a conservative dressed woman, wearing a fair short coat and black pants, made a sniffing noise when i passed her. At the petrolstation there were two men in front of me, one stored beer in his backpack, the other was a somewhat conservatively black dressed man. Then a man with pale skin, wearing a limegreen t-shirt over a white sweatshirt arrived with a bicycle. He stood behind me, had grey eyes with very small pupils, he was all the time talking to himself. When the black dressed man bougth something a black taxi arrived, it came so close that his fender nearly touched the kerbstone. The taxidriver knew the men who was standing in front of me, i walked to the till, the taxidriver, a bigger heavy bristle-bearded man, shouted joyfully "i have to go for big boys"( "ich muss mal für grosse jungs"/~to go for small boys~ means to pee in german ), and when i was still standing there, taking the beer, he hurryed came close behind me and put something in the drawer. Then he got the toilet key( on a short rope as pendant ), and walked behind the station. The man with the small pupils asked for fruit-gums( Fruchtgummis ), speaking very cranky. Maybe it was part of a composite joke.
At nigth i heared some meaningful coughs outside.
When i arrived in the pedestrian zone in the afternoon of the 15th, there was a man standing, demonstratively waiting, i already expected that it was for me. He had short hair, was wearing an earthy-orange t-shirt beneath his jacket, with his rigth he was holding a cellphone at his ear, he was holding his left arm in front of him, looking at the watch. He didn't move at all, had a strained expression, the way he was posing looked as if a military exercise would be going on. In the moment i passed him he started to move, walking in the direction i came from, he had used my arrival as his trigger. There were many people in town, because there was a open-air-concert at the water.
In the evening i was again at the petrolstation i had been the day before. There was a bigger group of teenagers in front of it, one yelled "shit" (" scheisse ") when i arrived, not adressed to me, but timing. When i was standing line up the man who paid was standing there for a while without moving, it took him somewhat longer. In front of me there was a couple, not older than 18, he was tall and slender, wearing dark clothing, she was blonde. She had a monologue about frogs all the time, and spoke like a little child, but serious. She had a frog, the eyes were soo big. She had another frog. The clerk was dressed in black, he had similarity with the one from aikido who was doing most for them. But the clerk was smaller and slender. He had a black button as ear-decoration, maybe he was gay. When i payed he snorted one nostril. A man came in and hurried headed at the till. While i was still standing there he said "the two"( "die zwei" ) and payed, without waiting that i stepped to the side, same as the one yesterday did. I looked at him. He was it again, the bristle-bearded. He was wearing a black t-shirt, something printed on it. He didn't wait for exchange, walked out, this time he had a red car.
Near midnigth, already on the 16th, i was again at a petrolstation. I had consumed a few beer, and wanted a few more. When i was standing at the till a couple arrived, then stood next to me. The woman had a narrow nosebridge, she was wearing a snow-camouflage-coat. The man was standing with his back towards me, he was wearing a black and red leather jacket. They talked fastly all the time, seemed to be russian. The man said a single sentence in german " he belongs to it/them " (" Der gehört dazu "). Seemed it refers to me. They were standing between me and my bicycle, i looked at them, just because they stood near me. Then the woman said "you have looked at me" ("du hast mich angesehen"), the man said so also. Both looked at me, their eyes didn't move at all, their expressions were so similar that i thougth if they would have consumed a substance that supported this. Maybe it was thougth as a classic intro for an attack. Maybe it was the beer, i just said "so what, you (two) are looking at me also"( "na und, ihr seht mich doch auch an" ), then ignored them and stored the beer into my bag. The man agressively asked me if i would have finished at the till, i had and took my bicycle, and said they should relax(locker bleiben) when i left. Maybe i had luck.
In the afternoon a gesturer passed me in the near park, a man wearing a poloshirt and pants of the same dark blue colour, he covered his mouth with his hand.
Maybe i've described about 2/3 of them an average, varies by day.
Montag, 3. September 2007
take it away
When i was at the shopping centre at the 28th of august i've bougth some fast food. When i was standing in line a woman, waiting at the till next to me, put a little girl, dressed in orange, at the age when they just can walk, next to me on the ground, the way that the girl stood on her heels and and knee-jerked did little steps backwarts, trying to find balance, till the corner of a column stopped her at her shoulder. The woman had usually routine with martial arts or something like this and used the child to show me. Outside the shopping centre one of their dark black bodybuilded shaved bald ones, this one with a short peppercorn( don't know if it's same word in english)-beard, passed me to show presence.
I had my window opened very early in the morning of the 29th, someone passes outside and snots especially loud. Quarter of an hour i go in the bath, my neighbour above me pees again at the same time as i.
I was outside two times, at all half an hour, one time one of their sniffers passed me.
When i was outside before noon on the 3oth a nosegesturer passed me at the streetcrossing at the park. He had the synthetic energetic happiness in his face they sometimes have. He had his arms tigth to his body, with the back of one hand he wiped below his nose, in the other he was holding popcorn, made his nosegesture between fastly inserting popcorn. He was walking as bow-legged as possible, walking on the exterior sides of his feet, demonstrativly overdone. I have some health-problems and rarely walk, so this was usually to caricature this. His lower body was in contrast to his upper body, he was one of their composite ones.
When i bougth me some fastfood at evening there have been few people on the streets, most seemed scripted. At the beginning at the streetcrossing at the market place i passed two muslim woman, both wearing black cloaks, the one had a headscarf, the other one had the traditional disguise that only showed the eyes. The next people behind them walked fastly in the same direction, three younger people, the man next to me was already on the cycle-lane, so there was not much space, he didn't react on this. It lookes somewhat as if they were targeting towards the muslim women. Then on the other side of the next streetcrossing there was a man with a long umbrella, the metal-tip pointing backwards, and higher than the handle. He had some tension on his hand, he looked like a watchman and with this the umbrella like a club. When i was waiting inside the shop my bicycle was at the entrance, i had no lock with me and was sitting at the window, keeping an eye on it. A bald shaved man with a grey camoflagejacket stood in front of it, somewhat agressiv expression, stood there for a while, then moved on. Inside the two saleswomen talked to a friend of them, one woman was all the time backbiting about someone, maybe her ex-friend. She repeatedly complained how much margarine he had consumed a week, including quoting the well known margarine-slogan "where is the laetta ?!". Somehow i had the impression that they hoped for a reaction from me. On my way back two running man dressed in suits passed me on an empty street. Both dressed the same, the one was a white one, the other a dark black one. They moved at the same speed, as a team. There were some straps visible at their jackets, it looked as if they were part of the jackets because it was so orderly. The two looked very moviesque and officiary the way they were running.
On my way to the shopping centre on the 31rst there was an orderly dressed discreet nosegesturer on the other side of the streetcrossing, and when i had crossed the street someone came up to me, looking at me, but then passed me. He had very wet eyes, also around the eyes the skin was wet, looked drugged. He kept his upper body leaned much forward, and his arms were somewhat spread from the body, no one would normally move like this, it was clearly for show. In his left he had an umbrella, the knob forwards, he could have used it for a stabbing move from this position. He was taller than me, or would have been if he wouldn't had moved that mutant way. He had short hair, was wearing a pale linen jacket, he was dressed similar to me in the late 90ies. On my way back i've seen the two muslim women from the day before, near the same streetcrossing, as if they just would had crossed the street since then. One was moving an empty wheelchair. I think they also had something yesterday, but not sure if it was the same. When i had turned into the next street i've seen the two runners from yesterday, some distance in front of me on the other side, this time walking and without jackets, they both had backpack. Seems they want to confirm that they are their people.
About noon i crossed the bridge between the west and the east side on the 1rst of september, on the westside a skinhead come up to me from the side, that way that i've seen him from the corner of my eye when he was next to me, he then passed behind me. He was wearing a black poloshirt, jeans, and black martens-boots with red laces. When i had crossed the bridge two muslim men came towards me, talking, one said louder "islam" before i passed them.
On the 2nd i was at a circus to take some sketches from animals, some could be seen from outside. There were also people inside, but i had enough to do for about 1 1/2 h. I thougth of leaving, then i've seen that some entered the area from between the a wagon and the stable tent. It was open, not ajar, looked like an entrance. I wondered, but it seemed normal, because people walked there. To my rigth there were big dogs, i took a sketch of one, then again from the animals on the other side. A boy who was there with a friend said " a little while ago they were four " ( "das waren vorhin noch 4" )to me, concerning the dogs. I'm not sure, i think i had also seen four before i turned around, they were moving and barking all the time, maybe one of the circus people had taken one away. I thougth of going deeper in the area, somehow it seemed odd. I looked around, one of the circus people wearing a costume showed up and asked if i would have a ticket for watching the animals. So i left, i walked to my bicycle, the two boys were sitting on their bicycles, the one who talked to me before was facing me, he repeatedly yelled " take it away ! " ( "nimm das weg !" )towards me. He didn't move, looked happy and sounded agressiv. I'm not so good in estimating age, but younger then ten, maybe 8 years old. He behaved like a robot, and there was no one else near me. Leaning against the front wheel of his bicycle there was a tiny bmx-cycle. The boy once looked to his side, shouted, but then again looked towards my direction and yelled "take it away". Then a smaller black-haired boy came from the side and took his cycle. I moved towards the other side of the circus, at the corner a heavier black woman with little children, who had also watched the animals and was standing next to me when i took a sketch from the ones opposite the dogs, walked in front of me. When i was close she shouted to her little boy "speed up" (in englich), twice. She was really loud, it seemed overdone, i don't know why she did, the boy was walking next to her, she had walked only along the circus, there was no street near. The way she shouted fitted to the boy on the bicycle before. Then i was at the real entrance with the till, but there was no one there, watching animals is only at certain time.
When i left home at noon on the 3rd the first person i've seen was a man who snotted both nostrils, here at the streetcrossing. Then i was at a petrol-station, in front of it there was a man wearing brown sunglasses, he had a fat neck/throat, he just stood there like a traffic-sign. He looked especially smeary, must be a side-effect from red-ligth. When i was back and opened the entrance two dogs came running towards me. Smaller dogs, looked friendly. One sniffed at me leg. A woman was standing on the streetcrossing, she looked towards me/her dogs, she had a cellphone at her ear, she said "you'll come...i'm here in this city". Yesterday there were the big dogs, and on the other side of the caged area there were four smaller dogs. These dogs now looked similar to two of them.
I thougth the "take it away" yesterday should have suggested that i opened the "second entrance", but maybe it was double-or with the bmxplea- triple meaning, if one of the big dogs would be really missing.
In the afternoon some children came down the street here, maybe 10 years old, the first one seemed to be the oldest, he said "o.k.", then they started marching in line, stomping their feet, shouting "left-rigth"'s (links-rechts), and then started singing in USarmy-rythm, repeatedly :" we are sick kanaks" (" wir sind kranke Kanaken "), and once "now we'll get drunk" (" wir gehen jetzt saufen "). When they had passed the house they stopped marching. Two of them had a darker complexion.
Some others. My neighbour above me was more attached to me than usual. Peeing at the same time. Walking above me, also following above me when i moved. When i turned on the heater for the first time( had to hit it a few times) he repeatedly grabed the pipe that connects the heaters through the floors.
I had my window opened very early in the morning of the 29th, someone passes outside and snots especially loud. Quarter of an hour i go in the bath, my neighbour above me pees again at the same time as i.
I was outside two times, at all half an hour, one time one of their sniffers passed me.
When i was outside before noon on the 3oth a nosegesturer passed me at the streetcrossing at the park. He had the synthetic energetic happiness in his face they sometimes have. He had his arms tigth to his body, with the back of one hand he wiped below his nose, in the other he was holding popcorn, made his nosegesture between fastly inserting popcorn. He was walking as bow-legged as possible, walking on the exterior sides of his feet, demonstrativly overdone. I have some health-problems and rarely walk, so this was usually to caricature this. His lower body was in contrast to his upper body, he was one of their composite ones.
When i bougth me some fastfood at evening there have been few people on the streets, most seemed scripted. At the beginning at the streetcrossing at the market place i passed two muslim woman, both wearing black cloaks, the one had a headscarf, the other one had the traditional disguise that only showed the eyes. The next people behind them walked fastly in the same direction, three younger people, the man next to me was already on the cycle-lane, so there was not much space, he didn't react on this. It lookes somewhat as if they were targeting towards the muslim women. Then on the other side of the next streetcrossing there was a man with a long umbrella, the metal-tip pointing backwards, and higher than the handle. He had some tension on his hand, he looked like a watchman and with this the umbrella like a club. When i was waiting inside the shop my bicycle was at the entrance, i had no lock with me and was sitting at the window, keeping an eye on it. A bald shaved man with a grey camoflagejacket stood in front of it, somewhat agressiv expression, stood there for a while, then moved on. Inside the two saleswomen talked to a friend of them, one woman was all the time backbiting about someone, maybe her ex-friend. She repeatedly complained how much margarine he had consumed a week, including quoting the well known margarine-slogan "where is the laetta ?!". Somehow i had the impression that they hoped for a reaction from me. On my way back two running man dressed in suits passed me on an empty street. Both dressed the same, the one was a white one, the other a dark black one. They moved at the same speed, as a team. There were some straps visible at their jackets, it looked as if they were part of the jackets because it was so orderly. The two looked very moviesque and officiary the way they were running.
On my way to the shopping centre on the 31rst there was an orderly dressed discreet nosegesturer on the other side of the streetcrossing, and when i had crossed the street someone came up to me, looking at me, but then passed me. He had very wet eyes, also around the eyes the skin was wet, looked drugged. He kept his upper body leaned much forward, and his arms were somewhat spread from the body, no one would normally move like this, it was clearly for show. In his left he had an umbrella, the knob forwards, he could have used it for a stabbing move from this position. He was taller than me, or would have been if he wouldn't had moved that mutant way. He had short hair, was wearing a pale linen jacket, he was dressed similar to me in the late 90ies. On my way back i've seen the two muslim women from the day before, near the same streetcrossing, as if they just would had crossed the street since then. One was moving an empty wheelchair. I think they also had something yesterday, but not sure if it was the same. When i had turned into the next street i've seen the two runners from yesterday, some distance in front of me on the other side, this time walking and without jackets, they both had backpack. Seems they want to confirm that they are their people.
About noon i crossed the bridge between the west and the east side on the 1rst of september, on the westside a skinhead come up to me from the side, that way that i've seen him from the corner of my eye when he was next to me, he then passed behind me. He was wearing a black poloshirt, jeans, and black martens-boots with red laces. When i had crossed the bridge two muslim men came towards me, talking, one said louder "islam" before i passed them.
On the 2nd i was at a circus to take some sketches from animals, some could be seen from outside. There were also people inside, but i had enough to do for about 1 1/2 h. I thougth of leaving, then i've seen that some entered the area from between the a wagon and the stable tent. It was open, not ajar, looked like an entrance. I wondered, but it seemed normal, because people walked there. To my rigth there were big dogs, i took a sketch of one, then again from the animals on the other side. A boy who was there with a friend said " a little while ago they were four " ( "das waren vorhin noch 4" )to me, concerning the dogs. I'm not sure, i think i had also seen four before i turned around, they were moving and barking all the time, maybe one of the circus people had taken one away. I thougth of going deeper in the area, somehow it seemed odd. I looked around, one of the circus people wearing a costume showed up and asked if i would have a ticket for watching the animals. So i left, i walked to my bicycle, the two boys were sitting on their bicycles, the one who talked to me before was facing me, he repeatedly yelled " take it away ! " ( "nimm das weg !" )towards me. He didn't move, looked happy and sounded agressiv. I'm not so good in estimating age, but younger then ten, maybe 8 years old. He behaved like a robot, and there was no one else near me. Leaning against the front wheel of his bicycle there was a tiny bmx-cycle. The boy once looked to his side, shouted, but then again looked towards my direction and yelled "take it away". Then a smaller black-haired boy came from the side and took his cycle. I moved towards the other side of the circus, at the corner a heavier black woman with little children, who had also watched the animals and was standing next to me when i took a sketch from the ones opposite the dogs, walked in front of me. When i was close she shouted to her little boy "speed up" (in englich), twice. She was really loud, it seemed overdone, i don't know why she did, the boy was walking next to her, she had walked only along the circus, there was no street near. The way she shouted fitted to the boy on the bicycle before. Then i was at the real entrance with the till, but there was no one there, watching animals is only at certain time.
When i left home at noon on the 3rd the first person i've seen was a man who snotted both nostrils, here at the streetcrossing. Then i was at a petrol-station, in front of it there was a man wearing brown sunglasses, he had a fat neck/throat, he just stood there like a traffic-sign. He looked especially smeary, must be a side-effect from red-ligth. When i was back and opened the entrance two dogs came running towards me. Smaller dogs, looked friendly. One sniffed at me leg. A woman was standing on the streetcrossing, she looked towards me/her dogs, she had a cellphone at her ear, she said "you'll come...i'm here in this city". Yesterday there were the big dogs, and on the other side of the caged area there were four smaller dogs. These dogs now looked similar to two of them.
I thougth the "take it away" yesterday should have suggested that i opened the "second entrance", but maybe it was double-or with the bmxplea- triple meaning, if one of the big dogs would be really missing.
In the afternoon some children came down the street here, maybe 10 years old, the first one seemed to be the oldest, he said "o.k.", then they started marching in line, stomping their feet, shouting "left-rigth"'s (links-rechts), and then started singing in USarmy-rythm, repeatedly :" we are sick kanaks" (" wir sind kranke Kanaken "), and once "now we'll get drunk" (" wir gehen jetzt saufen "). When they had passed the house they stopped marching. Two of them had a darker complexion.
Some others. My neighbour above me was more attached to me than usual. Peeing at the same time. Walking above me, also following above me when i moved. When i turned on the heater for the first time( had to hit it a few times) he repeatedly grabed the pipe that connects the heaters through the floors.
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